Understanding Grief and the Grieving Process
You’ve lost someone or something you love deeply. The world feels muted, colorless, and wrong. You might feel a profound sadness, a confusing numbness, or waves of anger and guilt. Your heart feels broken. This is grief. It is one of the most painful and universal of all human experiences. It is not an illness or a disorder; it is the natural, healthy, and necessary response to loss.
At Televero Health, we help our patients understand that there is no “right” way to grieve. The grieving process is as unique as the love that preceded it. Therapy can provide a safe, compassionate space to navigate this painful journey, to honor your loss, and to slowly, gently, begin to heal.
Grief Is More Than Just Sadness
While sadness is a central part of grief, the experience is much broader and more complex. Grief can affect every part of you—your emotions, your thoughts, your body, and your spirit.
You might experience:
- A wide range of emotions: Sadness, anger, guilt, confusion, relief, loneliness, and even moments of peace can all be part of the process. These feelings can come in unpredictable waves.
- Physical symptoms: Grief can manifest in the body as fatigue, nausea, changes in appetite or sleep, aches and pains, and a weakened immune system.
- Cognitive difficulties: You might have trouble concentrating, feel disorganized, or be preoccupied with thoughts and memories of what you have lost.
- Changes in your spiritual or existential beliefs: A major loss can cause you to question your faith, your values, and your understanding of the meaning of life.
The Myth of the “Five Stages” of Grief
You have probably heard of the “five stages of grief”: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. This model, developed by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, was originally based on her work with people who were dying, not people who were grieving a loss. While these five experiences can certainly be a part of grief, it is a myth that everyone goes through them in a neat, linear order.
A more accurate way to think of grief is as a messy, unpredictable process. It’s more like a wild scribble than a straight line. You might feel acceptance one day and be hit by a wave of anger the next. All of these experiences are a normal part of the process. There is no timeline for grief. It takes as long as it takes.
How Therapy Can Help with Grief
You do not have to walk through your grief alone. A therapist can be a compassionate companion on this difficult path. Therapy for grief, often called bereavement counseling, is not about trying to “fix” you or to make your pain go away. The goal is to help you to process the loss and to learn to live with it.
A therapist can help you to:
- Have a safe space to feel your feelings. In a world that is often uncomfortable with deep sadness, the therapy room is a place where all of your feelings are welcome. You can cry, you can be angry, you can be confused, without any judgment.
- Tell the story of your loss. Talking about the person you lost and the relationship you had is an important part of honoring their memory and processing the reality of their absence.
- Learn to cope with the pain. A therapist can teach you healthy coping mechanisms to manage the most intense waves of grief.
- Navigate the secondary losses. A major loss often brings with it other, secondary losses—the loss of a role, the loss of a future you had planned, the loss of a social circle. Therapy can help you to identify and grieve these as well.
- Begin to reinvest in life. Healing from grief does not mean forgetting. It means learning to carry the loss with you as you slowly begin to find meaning, connection, and even joy in your life again. It’s about integrating the loss into the story of who you are now.
Grief is the price we pay for love. It is a testament to the depth of our connection. Be gentle with yourself in your grief. Allow yourself to feel what you feel, and do not be afraid to reach out for support. You deserve to be held in your sorrow as you navigate your way toward a new kind of normal.
Key Takeaways
- Grief is the natural and necessary response to loss, and it affects your emotions, your body, and your thoughts.
- There is no “right” way or linear timeline for grieving; it is a messy and unique process for each person.
- Therapy provides a safe, non-judgmental space to process your feelings, honor your loss, and learn to cope with the pain.
- Healing from grief is not about forgetting, but about learning to integrate the loss into your life as you slowly find your way back to meaning and connection.
Ready to take the first step? We can help. Get started with Televero Health today.